I once knew a ***** from Peru
Who lined her vagina with glue
She said with a grin
If they pay to get in
They should pay to get out of it too.

 

"His bike was quite nice.

Made by people eating rice."

Ok, I'm lost, whose got the punchline?

 

They said, "needs some spice"

XD

EDIT: just looked what a limerick is... needs a few lines...

 

A young man called Timbuctoo
Whose limericks stopped at line two.
His bike was quite nice.
Made by folks who eat rice
But New Yorkers will eat it with stew.....

 

Guess you didn't know about the revenge the rabbit got.

One day the Rabbit and the Bear were walking in the woods when they came upon a lamp. The Bear rubbed the lamp and out popped a Genie and the Bear JUMPED and said, "Me first" as he pushed the rabbit aside.

The Genie said, "You each get 3 wishes, so begin."

The Bear says, "I want to be a sexy bear." The Genie says, "It is done" and the bear is sexy. You can start to hear other bears rustling around in the woods.

The Rabbit stops and thinks.. and the Bear tells him to hurry up... The rabbit then says, "I want a motorcycle helmet!" The Genie says, "It is done" and the Rabbit gets a helmet. The Bear laughs, says, "What are you going to do with that... we are in the WOODS, idiot" and pushes the Rabbit down.

The Bear says, "I want to be the sexiest bear in THESE woods right here." The Genie says, "It is done." The noise of the bears rustling around gets louder and closer. The Bear is starting to strut.

The Rabbit continues to think and is told to once again hurry up by the Bear.. The Rabbit says, "I want a little small motorcycle." The Genie says, "It is done" and the Rabbit gets a motorcycle. The Bear begins to laugh and roll around, "You IDIOT, what are you going to with that??"

The Bear then quickly belts out... "I WANT TO BE THE SEXIEST BEAR IN THE WHOLE WORLD!!!!!" The Genie says, "It is done" and the Bear is ecstatic. You can hear bears for miles growling and rustling around, The Bear doesn't know what to do.

The Rabbit thinks and thinks and thinks.... Then says... "You know what Genie...." (Points to the Bear) "I want him to be gay, and then takes off on his motorcycle!"

 

Yes, I do believe that passes the first test, lines 1,2 & 5 should rhyme.

I don't think the stanza is quite right; but what the hell, no a bad effort for a bunch of old farts?

I bet none of us have "Poet" listed on our CV.

 

A young man called Timbuctoo
Whose limericks stopped at line two.
His bike was quite nice.
Made by folks who eat rice
For a New Yorker, this limerick will do.

 

Yep, TBT that works pretty well. I think you are now qualified to add "poet - unpublished" to your CV.

Perhaps you may like to get us started with "The Aussie called Steve" ?

 

There was an old man from Australia

Who painted his *** like a Dahlia

The shape it was fine

And the color devine

But the aroma--well, that was a faihlia

 

Thank the Lord for my daughters Rhyming Dictionary.

"There once was a man, Steve the Plumber.

Who when banned, was replaced by a newcomer.

Her spelling and grace,

Helped Steve to save face,

When he returned t'was a bit of a bummer."


YEEESSSS!!!

And if that passes muster can I perhaps suggest we now have a go at Sprock who has a very small etc etc.

Over to you guys.