The Hurricane Saloon Off Topic

Today's giggle

Thread Tools
 
Search this Thread
 
  #501  
Old 07-21-2010, 08:24 AM
Shadow's Avatar
Redcoat, & Maxwell's Silver Hammer, MVN and curmudgeon
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Mud hut, Zululand
Posts: 11,608
Likes: 0
Received 5 Likes on 5 Posts
Default

A DAMN FINE EXPLANATION

The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman.

And she was somewhat upset. 'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me -- a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce right away!'

And the husband replied, 'Hang on just a minute love so at least I can tell you what happened.' 'Fine, go ahead,' she sobbed,' but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!'

And the husband began -- 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home, and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car.

I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days.

So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.

Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw them away.

Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are too tight.

I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste.

I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair the same.'

The husband took a quick breath and continued - 'She was so grateful for my understanding and help that as I walked her to the door, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, 'Please ... Do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?'.............................................
 
  #502  
Old 07-21-2010, 09:21 AM
Sprock's Avatar
Administrator, MVN / ROTM NOV 2012
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Republic of Boon Island
Posts: 11,003
Likes: 0
Received 3 Likes on 3 Posts
Default

Awe ............ man............ that's a great one right there ***** .....excellent !
 
  #503  
Old 07-21-2010, 10:33 AM
JHouse's Avatar
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Houston Exburbs
Posts: 1,441
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Default

I just sent it to some friends.
 
  #504  
Old 07-21-2010, 02:16 PM
kilgoretrout's Avatar
Administrator - Retired
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: PA, USA
Posts: 8,194
Likes: 0
Received 2 Likes on 2 Posts
Default

LOL.... Very nice...
 
  #505  
Old 07-21-2010, 02:55 PM
Sprock's Avatar
Administrator, MVN / ROTM NOV 2012
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Republic of Boon Island
Posts: 11,003
Likes: 0
Received 3 Likes on 3 Posts
Talking know ****

 
  #506  
Old 07-21-2010, 02:58 PM
JHouse's Avatar
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Houston Exburbs
Posts: 1,441
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Default

That's REALLY funny. I did laugh out loud. And I mailed that off too.

Edit: and the more I thought about it the funnier it got, on so many levels. I walked around laughing for about a half hour. Cried. Got a runny nose. That is a classic.
 

Last edited by JHouse; 07-21-2010 at 03:45 PM.
  #507  
Old 07-21-2010, 05:23 PM
Sprock's Avatar
Administrator, MVN / ROTM NOV 2012
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Republic of Boon Island
Posts: 11,003
Likes: 0
Received 3 Likes on 3 Posts
Default

..... I'll say and you are not supposed to laugh at your own jokes ..... it nearly killed me !
 
  #508  
Old 07-21-2010, 05:32 PM
hawkwind's Avatar
September 2009 ROTM Winner - Faster than a Speeding ..........
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 3,808
Likes: 0
Received 1 Like on 1 Post
Default

That one's a killer Mark! Got me laughing out loud too!!
 
  #509  
Old 07-22-2010, 02:59 AM
Shadow's Avatar
Redcoat, & Maxwell's Silver Hammer, MVN and curmudgeon
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Mud hut, Zululand
Posts: 11,608
Likes: 0
Received 5 Likes on 5 Posts
Default

ME TOO
BRILLIANT !!! Coffee on screen again....................
 


Quick Reply: Today's giggle



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 09:13 PM.