Today's giggle
Sick!!
#1333
12-18-2012, 02:24 PM
Senior Member & 2010 ROTY
#1339
12-30-2012, 08:13 AM
Member & ROTM DEC 2012
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: SA
Posts: 33
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The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.
The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the Race again, and it won again.
The local paper read:
PASTOR'S *** OUT FRONT.
The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.
The next day, the local paper headline read:
BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ...***.
This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey.
The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:
NUN HAS BEST *** IN TOWN.
The bishop fainted.
He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer
for $10.
The next day the paper read:
NUN SELLS *** FOR $10.
This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.
The next day the headlines read:
NUN ANNOUNCES HER *** IS WILD AND FREE.
The bishop was buried the next day.
The moral of the story is . . . being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery, even shorten your life.
Be yourself and enjoy life.
Stop worrying about everyone else's *** and you'll be a lot happier and live longer!
The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the Race again, and it won again.
The local paper read:
PASTOR'S *** OUT FRONT.
The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.
The next day, the local paper headline read:
BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ...***.
This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey.
The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:
NUN HAS BEST *** IN TOWN.
The bishop fainted.
He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer
for $10.
The next day the paper read:
NUN SELLS *** FOR $10.
This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.
The next day the headlines read:
NUN ANNOUNCES HER *** IS WILD AND FREE.
The bishop was buried the next day.
The moral of the story is . . . being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery, even shorten your life.
Be yourself and enjoy life.
Stop worrying about everyone else's *** and you'll be a lot happier and live longer!
#1340
12-30-2012, 08:14 AM
Member & ROTM DEC 2012
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: SA
Posts: 33
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Two elderly ladies were outside their nursing home, having a smoke, when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking. The other lady asked, "What's that?" "A condom," the lady responded. "This way my cigarette doesn't get wet." "Where did you get it?" the other lady asked. "You can get them at any drugstore."
The next... day, the second lady hobbled herself down to the local drugstore and announced to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms. The guy looked at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80 years of age), but politely asks what brand she prefers.
"It doesn't matter as long as it fits a Camel."
The pharmacist fainted.
The next... day, the second lady hobbled herself down to the local drugstore and announced to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms. The guy looked at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80 years of age), but politely asks what brand she prefers.
"It doesn't matter as long as it fits a Camel."
The pharmacist fainted.