ahahaha .. sorry mang but that makes me laugh. old people that just don*t give a d@mn anymore crack me up .. like the old man yelling across the mall "d@mnit Edna we never had no d@mn plymouth" out of the blue.

Anyway, I agree the best method is just to kill them with kindness. bake a pie and take it over to them for no reason. if that doesn*t work just grab a newspaper, squat down and drop a shadooby on their front lawn ... no harm done, point made.

 

[quote]ORIGINAL: Kewl Breeze




Lmao, a Shadooby.. thats gold. All great idea's. There is a good chance something will come back to bite me in the ***, but he's been such a ***** for so long, its just something i gotta do

 

Around here people get fox **** from hunting supply and put it in the vents on the cowl section behind the hood......it lasts for months and smells awfull....

 

And now for something completely different. You say this guy is really old. Well, if he really is old, not just in his 50's, there's a chance he's becoming senile. Certainly the behavior you describe fits. Does he have any children you could talk to? Is there an agency that deals with the elderly and their problems? Any social services people you can call? The police might be a place to start. Explain the problem, ask them what resources there are in the area.

What I'm saying is to give the guy a chance. It might turn out that his only problem is that he's a total jerk and has been all his life. There are people in the world thatare. Before making that judgement, though,take the time to determine if he needs help, and if it can be given.

The solutions offered by others on the forum are pretty juvenile. Not only that, the actions proposed carry the possibility of escalating your neighbor's behavior. Are you sure he hasn't a closet full of shotguns? Prod him enough and you might find out the hard way.

 

I like to tie all the doors shut. Most houses they all open in, get some good small rope and learn how to tie good knots and tie all the doors to something. Its fun to watch them crawl out the window lol but if he is old he might break a hip so the might not be the best option. O and if he has a garage this plan fails so dont bother if thats the case. that was a fun prank in the dorms though, just tied all the doors together. good luck!

 

Nope def not senile, just a dick. id say he's late 50's not super old. My family owned the house im in now for years, then i eventually bought it. hes always been this way. It just got really bad in the last couple years since he's retired, hes got nothing better to do. Could have something to do with him being around his nut job wife 24 hours a day. You should see the beard on her.. ZZ Top would be proud.
She's like a creature out of greek mythology.. (shutters) so gross.

 

Good god you guys.....hahahahahahahahahaha


Bunch of 7th grade beavis n butt head deviants



Well...I know what to do when my obnoxious neighbor pisses me off now [:-]

 

I would be installing a time lapse camera in my front yard if that were my neighbor so you can catch him in the act. You cannot trust people like that, and nothing you do will ever make anything better. You guys have some great suggestions, but they may make things worse for stubborn old f#cks like that.

 

a flaming bag of dog poo on his doorstep at night would be adam sandler funny.

like dram said tho, you should prolly call social services tho...but not in the way he is thinkin. if he is way old, dont bother...but if he is borderline old enough to be considered senile then go to step 2.

step 2 involves gettin close to the dudes fam...like his kids or somethin. start callin them everyonce and a while, say you are just startin be a lil conserned bout your neighbor, that you will be keepin an eye on him and yada yada yada.

step 3, every once and a while (if you can) move something that you see him using often in his garage so he looses it when he goes lookin for it and cant find it. he will prolly go round askin "Am i loosin my mind? It was right there before, right?"...eventually his wife will start guessin also.

step 4, call the cops if he does some crap again. when they come out, let them know that you have been tryin to keep an eye on him because he is a lil off, reference his kids and all that good ****e. they will wonder over to talk to him and prolly talk to him real slow like he is retarded...he will prolly look at them like he is because he will be guessing why they are talking to him all slow and loud and whatnot.

step 5, start callin the kids more and more...eventually they will be convinced its time for the old folks home. that will lead to them gettin him checked out by a doc and havin to look into old folks homes.

see, the idea here is that he cant be crazy, but its your job to start makin everybody close to him think that he is crazy, even have himself second guessin himself. go with the lawn gnome thing too, just make sure that he is the only one that sees em and move em back before anybody else does....he will really think he is gettin senile. eventually he will go to the doc and he will find out that he isnt but will still have it in the back of his mind. dude shouldnt be such a dick.

 

Dish detergent in the lawn. (rains and foams for weeks)
Fun with gorilla glue, use your imagination
Dilute hcl in his oil (thats serious damage though)
Thermite (again SERIOUS damage)
I have more but they get more F&*ked up.....