Today's giggle
Nice work Indy, a classic from way back.
Isn't it quite surprising, amongst the small sample of people from all over the world that make up the Hurricane section; just how many of us have links to Scotland and Ireland?
Isn't it quite surprising, amongst the small sample of people from all over the world that make up the Hurricane section; just how many of us have links to Scotland and Ireland?
An 80 year old woman was being interviewed at the reception of her 4th marriage. The interviewer asked her to reflect on her life and the men she married.
"In my 20s I married a Banker. In my 40s I married a Ring Master. In my 60s a Preacher. And now, a Funeral Director."
"Oh my! That is quite a diverse slice of lifestyles. Can you explain what attracted you to these men?", asked the interviewer.
"Well, I suppose;
One: for the Money
Two: for The Show,
Three: to Get Ready,
and
Four: To Go
"In my 20s I married a Banker. In my 40s I married a Ring Master. In my 60s a Preacher. And now, a Funeral Director."
"Oh my! That is quite a diverse slice of lifestyles. Can you explain what attracted you to these men?", asked the interviewer.
"Well, I suppose;
One: for the Money
Two: for The Show,
Three: to Get Ready,
and
Four: To Go
At dawn the telephone rings,
"Hello, Señor Bob ? This is Ernesto, the caretaker at your country house."
"Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"
"Um, I am just calling to advise you, Señor Bob , that your parrot, he is dead".
"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?"
"Si, Señor, that's the one."
"Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird. What did he die from?"
"From eating the rotten meat, Señor Bob .."
"Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?"
"Nobody, Señor. He ate the meat of the dead horse."
"Dead horse? What dead horse?"
"The thoroughbred, Señor Bob .."
"My prize thoroughbred is dead?"
"Yes, Señor Bob , he died from all that work pulling the water cart."
"Are you insane? What water cart?"
"The one we used to put out the fire, Señor."
"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"
"The one at your house, Señor! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire."
"What the hell? Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of a candle?!"
"Yes, Señor Bob ."
"But there's electricity at the house! What was the candle for?"
"For the funeral, Señor Bob .."
"WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL??!!"
"Your wife's, Señor Bob . She showed up very late one night and I thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Ping G15 204g titanium head golf club with the TFC 149D graphite shaft."
SILENCE...........
LONG SILENCE.........
VERY LONG SILENCE............
"Ernesto, if you broke that driver, you're in deep ****."

Cheers SB
"Hello, Señor Bob ? This is Ernesto, the caretaker at your country house."
"Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"
"Um, I am just calling to advise you, Señor Bob , that your parrot, he is dead".
"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?"
"Si, Señor, that's the one."
"Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird. What did he die from?"
"From eating the rotten meat, Señor Bob .."
"Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?"
"Nobody, Señor. He ate the meat of the dead horse."
"Dead horse? What dead horse?"
"The thoroughbred, Señor Bob .."
"My prize thoroughbred is dead?"
"Yes, Señor Bob , he died from all that work pulling the water cart."
"Are you insane? What water cart?"
"The one we used to put out the fire, Señor."
"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"
"The one at your house, Señor! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire."
"What the hell? Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of a candle?!"
"Yes, Señor Bob ."
"But there's electricity at the house! What was the candle for?"
"For the funeral, Señor Bob .."
"WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL??!!"
"Your wife's, Señor Bob . She showed up very late one night and I thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Ping G15 204g titanium head golf club with the TFC 149D graphite shaft."
SILENCE...........
LONG SILENCE.........
VERY LONG SILENCE............
"Ernesto, if you broke that driver, you're in deep ****."

Cheers SB
Seb,
that's the best joke I've heard in ages. Damned near destroyed my laptop with high velocity coffee. Wickedly wicked.
Thanks for making my day
H
that's the best joke I've heard in ages. Damned near destroyed my laptop with high velocity coffee. Wickedly wicked.
Thanks for making my day
H
A buddy of mine has just recently started a business in Afghanistan making exploding prayer mats.
He says prophets are through the roof.
He says prophets are through the roof.


