Today's giggle
How tough are Australian men??
The scene is set
- a dark night, cold wind blowing, campfire flickering, stars twinkling in the dark sky.
Three hang-glider pilots are sitting by the campfire,
One from Australia , one from Seth Efrika and one from New Zulland.
Each embroiled in the bravado for which they are famous.
The night of tales begins...
Kiven the Kiwi says, 'I must be the meanest, toughest, heng glider there es. Why, jist the other day I linded in a field and scared a crocodeale, who came out of the swamp and ate sux min who were standen close by. I grebbed the crocodeale and wristled him to du ground and killed em with my beer hends'
Hansie from Seth Efrika (who typically can't stand to be bettered) said, 'Well you guys, I lended orfter a 200 mile flight in my heng glider on a tiny trail, and a Namibian snike slid out from under a rock and made a move on me. I grebbed de borsted with me bare hinds and beet it's head off ind then sucked the poison from it's body down in one gulp. End I'm still here today'
Colin, the Tough Australian, remained silent, slowly poking the fire with his *****.
The scene is set
- a dark night, cold wind blowing, campfire flickering, stars twinkling in the dark sky.
Three hang-glider pilots are sitting by the campfire,
One from Australia , one from Seth Efrika and one from New Zulland.
Each embroiled in the bravado for which they are famous.
The night of tales begins...
Kiven the Kiwi says, 'I must be the meanest, toughest, heng glider there es. Why, jist the other day I linded in a field and scared a crocodeale, who came out of the swamp and ate sux min who were standen close by. I grebbed the crocodeale and wristled him to du ground and killed em with my beer hends'
Hansie from Seth Efrika (who typically can't stand to be bettered) said, 'Well you guys, I lended orfter a 200 mile flight in my heng glider on a tiny trail, and a Namibian snike slid out from under a rock and made a move on me. I grebbed de borsted with me bare hinds and beet it's head off ind then sucked the poison from it's body down in one gulp. End I'm still here today'
Colin, the Tough Australian, remained silent, slowly poking the fire with his *****.
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How tough are Australian men??
The scene is set
- a dark night, cold wind blowing, campfire flickering, stars twinkling in the dark sky.
Three hang-glider pilots are sitting by the campfire,
One from Australia , one from Seth Efrika and one from New Zulland.
Each embroiled in the bravado for which they are famous.
The night of tales begins...
Kiven the Kiwi says, 'I must be the meanest, toughest, heng glider there es. Why, jist the other day I linded in a field and scared a crocodeale, who came out of the swamp and ate sux min who were standen close by. I grebbed the crocodeale and wristled him to du ground and killed em with my beer hends'
Hansie from Seth Efrika (who typically can't stand to be bettered) said, 'Well you guys, I lended orfter a 200 mile flight in my heng glider on a tiny trail, and a Namibian snike slid out from under a rock and made a move on me. I grebbed de borsted with me bare hinds and beet it's head off ind then sucked the poison from it's body down in one gulp. End I'm still here today'
Colin, the Tough Australian, remained silent, slowly poking the fire with his *****.
The scene is set
- a dark night, cold wind blowing, campfire flickering, stars twinkling in the dark sky.
Three hang-glider pilots are sitting by the campfire,
One from Australia , one from Seth Efrika and one from New Zulland.
Each embroiled in the bravado for which they are famous.
The night of tales begins...
Kiven the Kiwi says, 'I must be the meanest, toughest, heng glider there es. Why, jist the other day I linded in a field and scared a crocodeale, who came out of the swamp and ate sux min who were standen close by. I grebbed the crocodeale and wristled him to du ground and killed em with my beer hends'
Hansie from Seth Efrika (who typically can't stand to be bettered) said, 'Well you guys, I lended orfter a 200 mile flight in my heng glider on a tiny trail, and a Namibian snike slid out from under a rock and made a move on me. I grebbed de borsted with me bare hinds and beet it's head off ind then sucked the poison from it's body down in one gulp. End I'm still here today'
Colin, the Tough Australian, remained silent, slowly poking the fire with his *****.
Yup!
That was very good Henry - I read it to Mrs SB and we both laughed out very loud at the punchline
And a response from Shadow or Kiwi TK in 4................3.....................2.......... .............1
Cheers, SB
Hmmm, might leave Shadow to deal with this one. Historically he's been pretty tough on race based jokes.
And do I really need to remind you guys again that Kiwis don't have an accent?; it's only people from other countries that have an accent.
And do I really need to remind you guys again that Kiwis don't have an accent?; it's only people from other countries that have an accent.
Party Animal, ROTM June 2014
Joined: Oct 2008
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What race based joke? That was all about nationality, not race...Totally different things.
Administrator, MVN / ROTM NOV 2012
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 11,003
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From: Republic of Boon Island
Bloody funny Joke
Henry - lolWhere's KenG - that nationality thing - well lets just say there can be
exceptions
at times 
Senior Member & can cook minute rice in 58sec
Joined: May 2009
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From: northern ireland/ulster/UK
we'll not be havin it.
nae lande-rover devender.
lol(i'm half kiweeeee)
Senior Member
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 4,237
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From: Bir Tawil
At the regular Saturday morning service, the rabbi announced that he was planning to leave for a larger congregation that would pay him more.
There is a hush within the congregation.
No one wants him to leave because he is so popular.
Fred Silverstein, who owns several car dealerships in Newton and Brookline, stands up and proclaims "If the rabbi stays, I will provide him with a new Cadillac every year and his wife with a Honda mini-van to transport their children!"
The congregation sighs in appreciation and applauds.
Saul Cohen, a successful businessman and lawyer, stands and says, "If the rabbi will stay on here, I'll personally double his salary and establish a foundation to guarantee a free college education for his children!"
More sighs and loud applause.
Estelle Rubin, age 88, stands and announces with a smile,
"If the rabbi stays, I will give him sex!"
There is total silence.
The rabbi, blushing, asks her: "Mrs. Rubin, you're a wonderful and holy lady. Whatever possessed you to say that?"
Estelle's 90-year old husband, Abe, is now trying to hide, holding his forehead with the palm of his hand and shaking his head from side to side, while his wife replies: "Well, I just asked my husband how we could help, and he said, "screw him."
There is a hush within the congregation.
No one wants him to leave because he is so popular.
Fred Silverstein, who owns several car dealerships in Newton and Brookline, stands up and proclaims "If the rabbi stays, I will provide him with a new Cadillac every year and his wife with a Honda mini-van to transport their children!"
The congregation sighs in appreciation and applauds.
Saul Cohen, a successful businessman and lawyer, stands and says, "If the rabbi will stay on here, I'll personally double his salary and establish a foundation to guarantee a free college education for his children!"
More sighs and loud applause.
Estelle Rubin, age 88, stands and announces with a smile,
"If the rabbi stays, I will give him sex!"
There is total silence.
The rabbi, blushing, asks her: "Mrs. Rubin, you're a wonderful and holy lady. Whatever possessed you to say that?"
Estelle's 90-year old husband, Abe, is now trying to hide, holding his forehead with the palm of his hand and shaking his head from side to side, while his wife replies: "Well, I just asked my husband how we could help, and he said, "screw him."