Wasps are quite possibly aliens.



"A few years ago, when we picked up a radio message from space, we assumed that it might have been a message from another species in space. We wouldn't dare answer in case it wasn't actually for us. But here is another idea. What if it was for wasps?
After the signal was recieved, there was a significant increase in wasps out and about.

There is plenty of evidence to show that wasps are not of this earth. Unlike any animal, they serve no purpose. They're not in the food chain, they can't make honey and they're not fluffy. Nature has a habit of extinguishing its more useless experiments, such as the dinosaur when it became too big and the dodo when it lost its wings.
Yet the wasp soldiers on.
Plus, a wasp can smell a bowl of sugar from five miles away. How? Sugar does not smell. And they can organise flight paths from their nests to known sources of food.

And another thing, wasps are vindictive. This means that while every other creature will attack when it's hungry or threatened, a wasp will attack if you've annoyed it in some way.

A wasp can lay its eggs inside a caterpillar, knowing that when they hatch the baby wasps will eat the creature from the inside out. Normally, the host's immune system would destroy the eggs before they hatch, but they are coated with a virus that genetically modifies the caterpillar to ignore the invasion. In other words, a wasp can alter the very being of another creature.
Biologists have examined this virus and found that it exists nowhere else on earth. They've also worked out that it's been around for more than 100 million years. Which is when the strange radio signal was sent. Furthermore, wasps are indestructible. If you chop off its head, the antennae will still be alive, wiggling, perhaps sending messages into space."
-Jeremy Clarkson, The Sunday Times.

 

I doubt you're dealing with a wasp. What you are describing is a Hornet.

Eating like a hornet, sleeping like a hornet, crying like a hornet, being the hornet, is the only way to know the hornet.

Once you have mastered being the hornet you will know where to go to find the hornet.

 

Are you getting all Bill Murray in Caddyshack on me, TBT?

I knew eventually one of these threads was going to boil down to me and the use of explosives.

Happy 4th!

 

Paper wasps are also yellow and black. They aren't very fast, either, and they're very common and not terribly aggressive.
I've seen them build their nests under the siding of houses (which can be hard to find), but mostly it's under eaves or anywhere else that's out of the elements. They hang those little paper honey-comb nests which are easy to destroy.

Hornets are much meaner and they live in much bigger enclosed nests. Those bastards will watch you from that little hole in the bottom of their big beehive-looking abode and they will attack you for seemingly no reason at all.
I have a special sort of hatred for hornets. I'm quite passionate about it.

Either way, you need to acquire a flame-thrower. If your wife/girlfriend insists that you're going to burn the house down (), then you'll need 2 industrial-sized cans of wasp and hornet killer (one for each hand) and a case or two for backup. Don't get the stuff that sprays a measly 20ft, either. You need the 30ft stuff at a minimum. And once you start spraying, don't let up! Letting up is an amateur mistake. You spray until there's nothing left.

 

I have some spray paint and a Bic lighter

 

My heart says yes, but my brain says no.

 

Damn,


I think you're right

 

You are funny boyzzzzzzz!

And spot on, they are deadly buggers when all riled up. Kill or be killed and I'd rethink the Bic lighter approach...............

Not professional advice etc, yada yada yada


Cheers, SB

 

I can vouch for the fact that a can of hairspray and a Bic lighter makes for a highly satisfying moth killer.

I seem to recall that it amused my children much more than my wife.

It's odd isn't it; that wives lose that sense of joy and wonderment that they used to have as children?

 

How about those Bald-Faced-Hornets? First they go after you and then start looking for family members. If they see you, they want a piece of you. They are like the Terminator, they will never quit.

One sting is not enough for a Bald-faced-hornet, OH NO! One is simply not enough. I don't care if I have to burn the entire neighborhood down, I WILL get them.

People take note: If they are in the ground, pour ample amounts of gasoline on the hole, light it off and start jumping on the ground. They will get angry and come flying up out of the hole and meet a fiery death.

I have done this many times and the next day you will be 100% hornet free.

Be careful with this method of wasp/hornet removal. One time a ground hole was a little bit to close to my mom's house and used way to much gas. I ended up smoking her entire rose garden and 1/2 of a huge pine tree that happened to be overhanging the roses. The pine tree had flames roaring up 30 feet above it and the damn thing nearly set her house on fire. Wow! The exterior of the house had hand split cedar shakes. They burn real good.

Mom was not happy about the tree but it grew back in 15 years (sort of).