Off Topic A place for you CBR junkies to boldly go off topic. Almost anything goes.

WHO IS JACK SCHITT ?

Thread Tools
 
Search this Thread
 
  #1  
Old 04-01-2008, 09:20 AM
Shadow's Avatar
Redcoat, & Maxwell's Silver Hammer, MVN and curmudgeon
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Mud hut, Zululand
Posts: 11,613
Likes: 0
Received 5 Likes on 5 Posts
Default WHO IS JACK SCHITT ?

Just for a laff........

Who is Jack Schitt?
For some time, many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt?

We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt!"

Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way. Here's the details:

Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Need Deep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.

After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.

Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt.

Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse.


Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.

Now when someone says "You don't know Jack Schitt", you will be able to correct them.

Sincerely,

Crock O. Schitt
 
  #2  
Old 04-01-2008, 11:10 AM
Flogger's Avatar
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Essex, England
Posts: 237
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Default RE: WHO IS JACK SCHITT ?

Gunny, do you know Sweet Fanny Adams?
 
  #3  
Old 04-01-2008, 01:42 PM
bluebeard's Avatar
Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Adelaide South Australia
Posts: 535
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Default RE: WHO IS JACK SCHITT ?

It's an oldie but a goodie.

Try this one. It's short but also good for a laugh.

One smart fella felt smart,
Two smart fellas they felt smart,
Three smart fellas they all felt smart together.
 
  #4  
Old 04-01-2008, 01:54 PM
Shadow's Avatar
Redcoat, & Maxwell's Silver Hammer, MVN and curmudgeon
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Mud hut, Zululand
Posts: 11,613
Likes: 0
Received 5 Likes on 5 Posts
Default RE: WHO IS JACK SCHITT ?

Flogger's losing his marbles - now he's confusing me with a certain Gunnery Sergeant of fearsome reputation........as for me, I know Fanny Adams, and she ain't sweet......
Get a grip, Sweeny,mate.....!!

Nice one, Blue, ar ar ar.....!
 
  #5  
Old 04-01-2008, 02:51 PM
CosmoBob's Avatar
Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Sweden, Northern Europe
Posts: 223
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Default RE: WHO IS JACK SCHITT ?

Why read the book, when you can watch the movie: Know Jack Schitt ?!
 
  #6  
Old 04-01-2008, 03:19 PM
Flogger's Avatar
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Essex, England
Posts: 237
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Default RE: WHO IS JACK SCHITT ?

Shadow, I will never forget you mate. Just trying to goad that Gunny bloke a little
 
  #7  
Old 04-02-2008, 12:25 AM
Shadow's Avatar
Redcoat, & Maxwell's Silver Hammer, MVN and curmudgeon
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Mud hut, Zululand
Posts: 11,613
Likes: 0
Received 5 Likes on 5 Posts
Default RE: WHO IS JACK SCHITT ?

The guys who put this photo on a bus clearly didn't know jack schitt, or the exhaust would've been moved........Is that you, Flogger Mate ? he he

[IMG]local://upfiles/22903/79F9B9D378CC441EBE037CDEBAB97E1C.jpg[/IMG]
 
  #8  
Old 04-02-2008, 02:26 AM
MarkR's Avatar
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Gold Coast, Australia
Posts: 976
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts
Default RE: WHO IS JACK SCHITT ?

Shadow1, you have too much time on your hands
 
  #9  
Old 04-02-2008, 02:50 AM
Shadow's Avatar
Redcoat, & Maxwell's Silver Hammer, MVN and curmudgeon
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Mud hut, Zululand
Posts: 11,613
Likes: 0
Received 5 Likes on 5 Posts
Default RE: WHO IS JACK SCHITT ?

G'Day MarkR !
As for your last, you may be right, but if you travel through life without laughter, you'll have a very miserable existence, especially in my chosen profession (giving baddies their just deserts, similar to Flogger, but different......)
The pic was sent to me by a friend, who's a fireman at Edinburgh airport, rides a 93 'Cane.......
seems like the Constabulary in the UK has a tough time in general, so need to laugh at themselves once in a while......
Don't you ever give your "Blue Heelers" some stick, now and again ?(and I don't mean that fine cattle dog, either) he he

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bizJW...eature=related
 
  #10  
Old 04-02-2008, 05:33 AM
MarkR's Avatar
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Gold Coast, Australia
Posts: 976
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes on 0 Posts


Quick Reply: WHO IS JACK SCHITT ?



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:27 PM.