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sucks for this dude

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  #1  
Old 12-03-2009 | 01:38 AM
johnnyb3's Avatar
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From: memphis tn
Default sucks for this dude

craigslist find lol.....



To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.



Date: 05-27-09, 1:43 A M EST.




I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on my girlfriend and me, threatening our lives.



You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings.



I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.



First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment when I drew my pistol after you took my Jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.



My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening.



Obviously you agree that it is a very Intimidating weapon when pointed at your head, wasn't it?



I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from bare footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].



After I called your mother, or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I Went and filled up my gas tank as well as four other people's in the gas station on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful!



I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]



I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.



Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what's going on with that?



Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).



In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider the career path you've chosen to pursue in life.



Remember, next time you might not be so lucky.



Have a good day!



Thoughtfully yours, Alex



P.S. Remember this motto. An armed society makes for a more civil society!
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  #2  
Old 12-03-2009 | 06:26 PM
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From: J-ville, FLORIDA
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This is the best post ever!!! Please put me on your friend list bro.... Im in tears over this and laughing histerically... ya never know when your gonna roll the wrong mother ****er!!! I love it ....Peece
 

Last edited by bambam; 12-03-2009 at 06:30 PM.
  #3  
Old 12-03-2009 | 06:29 PM
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hahaha i hope this is true
 
  #5  
Old 12-03-2009 | 06:43 PM
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now im bummed...
 
  #6  
Old 12-03-2009 | 07:03 PM
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hahahahaha!!! give me that purse....no no U give ME UR shoes.
 
  #7  
Old 12-03-2009 | 08:36 PM
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From: va
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ya that sucks it's not real, it seemed legit until the "pimp mobile" part...
 
  #8  
Old 12-03-2009 | 11:44 PM
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that sucks. i hoped it was real. i got it from another fourm i frequent...

and friend request sent.
 
  #9  
Old 12-04-2009 | 12:17 AM
jpanside@gmail.com's Avatar
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From: Seattle, WA
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Originally Posted by Hangfire
It's all fiction,

booo booo hangfire boo
 
  #10  
Old 12-04-2009 | 12:57 AM
kilgoretrout's Avatar
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From: PA, USA
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booo booo hangfire boo
haha! +1
What a downer. lol...

I've only heard this one like 20x, but I had the decency to pretend it was real.
 
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