The Story!
 

Just about every time I ride I run into a phenomenon I call "the story". I'll be stopped somewhere minding my own business, and it begins. I notice someone approaching. "Nice bike!" is normally how it starts.

After initial bike compliments the person invariably starts into a story. These stories usually involve them having some super machine at home, or how they know a guy who has a Hayabusa. Or worse yet they feel the need to recount their late best friend who was killed in a fireball of death after colliding with god-knows what.

The bike stories are always B.S., as I believe are the accident recounts for the most part. What I can't figure out is why people feel the need to come up and start talking to me in the first place, just because I've got a "crotch rocket" standing next to me. I really don't mind talking bikes with people that know them (but they generally roll up on other bikes). Acutally I need to take that statement back a bit. Some of the biggest morons I've encountered have approached straddling some ultra massive cruising bike.

I think it comes from people being terrified of the common sportbike. Almost invariable the story tellers are men. I think they feel ashamed for being awe struck by the bike (not to mention the guy standing next to it in full race suit). Just by being there I am out doing them. As their penis begins to shrink they feel they need to save themselves by justifying why they are in awe. They need to make up stories in order to somehow equate themselsve to the guy on the fast bike.

To give some examples of the best stories I've heard:

1. "Back in the 60's I had an Indian. I was forced to dump it in a ditch going 160mph to avoid an accident. I never rode again" (I'd love to see the mods done to that indian, the guy had some memory fade and forgot which Indian model he owned. Weird considering it was worth more than most cars on the road at that time.)

2. "I'm into fast bikes. I've got a 1976 CB900 at home. I took it off the road because I got too many speeding tickets. You've got the 600 eh? Well I'm sure once you've ridden a little more you'll want to move to something faster like the 900." (Maybe he had a CB900, but I noticed that the displacement only came out after he noticed mine was a lowly 600. Upon further probing regaring his bike it was pretty apparent he had never owned a bike of any kind)

3. "I've got a Harley Fatboy. I've had it up to about 140mph. It's fast! (his jaw dropped when I asked about his gearing and called him a liar. the bike is only geared for 115mph).

I'd be interested to know if this phenomenon only happens to me. If you've heard some good ones then please post them. I myself have stopped being polite. It has occurred enough i now just poke holes in the story, or simply say "I've got to go". I hate having to be an ass, but we all have our limits.

RE: The Story!
 

Interesting and true. I don't get very many people approaching me. I guess it's my facial expression. I don't have the friendly approachable face that would spark cordial conversation. I least that's my aim.

I haven't had very many elaborate stories, but the occasional 'nice bike' and 'cool color'. I can't think of a long winded story, per say, but what I do get are news reports. I get the 'did you hear about the rider that died?' stories.

Honestly, I'm not happy to admit it, but it's my family that typically feels compelled to 'inform' me of the latest and greatest tragic stories about death and dismemberment. My response is always the same. I shrug it off and say that every year people will die in Motorcycles, Automobiles, and Wal-Mart Self Check out isles. It's inevitable that an impatient Wal-Mart customer will be pushed too far waiting for the computer illiterate imbecile to simply slid the bar code threw the scan.

RE: The Story!
 

Yeah, I too have the phenomenon known as "stories" from time to time.

Mostly, I'll just get the "hey, nice bike" or such, but one that stands out was last summer when I was sitting at a red light:

Kid in car next to me: rolls down window and says nice bike.
me: thanks
kid: Is it fast?
me: sure, it's pretty quick
kid: I have aSuzuki R1 (yes, a suzuki R1)at home, but I'm scared to ride it
me: oh, that's cool.

If I had windows, I would have rolled them up at this point

kid: get on it when the light turns green
me: no, too many cops around - lame excuse, but I'm not out riding to impress anyone.

PS ^ I don't think Honda ever offered a CB900, so he was full of it. They had the famous CB750, 750KR, and also the smaller CB450. Even if they did, todays 600's would run circles around a dated 750 or 900 as the case may be.

RE: The Story!
 

last friday i pulled up next to an old yami 900...it was old but sooooo clean!
he said: "is that a thousand"
i said: "no i don't need a thousand"
he laughed...light turned green and he smoked me.

ok in reality i said: "no it's a 600" and he just turned his head. must've been my wife-beater tank top i was sporting that made him think i had a liter bike! muahahahhah

RE: The Story!
 

I haven't had any "stories" on my bike yet, but that did happen to me literally almost every day when I had my '65 mustang fastback. God, I loved that car. Anyway, I would hear stories ALL THE TIME about how "I used to have one of those when they were new" or "just a 289?? My Camaro's got a 350!" or "Hey, smoke them tires!"
My heart broke into millions of pieces the night a drunk illegal Mexican (no offense, Voodoo!) ran a red light and t-boned me. He fled the scene of the accident, but was followed home by a 19 yr old girl with her 2 yr old baby in the backseat. She called the cops, thankfully! Car was totaled, and I miss her dearly!

RE: The Story!
 

I think he turned away because you didn't offer him a sip of the Starbucks you were drinking while you were riding.

And Tennessee..."Qiereme como soy! Soy un badido enojado!!"

RE: The Story!
 

I like to repair the plastics on my bike if/when I wreck, but leave the "scars" on the paint. I know my bike isn't as pretty as the others, but it makes for some great conversation starters.

RE: The Story!
 

Que'? Golpea a su esposa y su cabritos??

RE: The Story!
 

Most of the stories I get are about riders who've died and I always ask...ohh what happened?

Well he was running from the cops and took a turn too wide...
He fell off cause a car cut him off... well was he wearing gear? No.

I have no sympathy/respect for people who dont respect their bikes, ride out of their skill level, or ride without a decent amount of gear on, no matter what. There's no excuse. There are a whole lot of ways to avoid cagers hitting you and whether the rider chooses to do it is their own business.

RE: The Story!
 

Check out the link: http://www.hondacb900f.com/
The CB900 came in a sport model (the 'F') with chain drive, and a Cruiser (the Special?) with a shaft drive IIRC. The 900F was a hot rod in its day. Dated now, but sill a good looking bike.

RE: The Story!
 

+1 rash adds character, i love being asked what my SI cage is for, or what happened to my tail section,
good post tho i get stories all the time, its like hearing about some fat guys football days from 1968, and then after his knee blew out he gained 300lbs and lost his hair, whatever

RE: The Story!
 

I stand corrected. The guy was still full of bs though, apparently they didn't have them in 1976 hahahaha

RE: The Story!
 

You are correct - I didn't read the post closely enough to catch that. The guy was full of it.

RE: The Story!
 

In the 80's, I worked in a government run rehab centre, had people from all over the state, come there for treatment/assessment. Lots of different ages & backgrounds. although the place catered for all types of disabilties, most common was head trauma (brain damage) from road accidents (although we had one guy that had walked into a propeller, but I'll save that for another time) With loss of or limited mobility of limbs, amputees & wheel chair bound, coming in close behind. Anyway, like its my 3rd day in the place and I'm running late and walk into the area I worked in, and the therapaist there was having a group session with about 1/2 dozen people. Unfortunately I was carrying my bike helmet & wearing my bomber jacket. One guy jumped up, pointed at me & started to wail in this really high pitched series of screams, I guess you realise that some of these guys had been involved in pretty traumatic bike accidents. If that was not enough to unsettle me, every Wednesday 9:00 am sharp, this same group would meet, (and we had a new batch of patients every two weeks) and I would have to listen to this group share their "Stories" of how the accident happened & what they went through afterwards (in technicolor).And because I rode, a lot of these guys would somehow manage to be standing around my bike when I was leaving to go home & yes I would get the same stories all over again. Now when I hear someone say, "I used to ride a bike...." I just think "Oh crap...!!!"

RE: The Story!
 

then you have the "i cant have a bike im so crazy id kill myself", oh really, good.

RE: The Story!
 

Just about everyone who talks to me about bikes that does not have one says something similar to that.

RE: The Story!
 

A met a kid through some friends that is really annoying. If that is not bad enough he has a story for everything. This doen't bother me, but what does are the ones i know are blatent lies. He walked up about a month back and jumped into a conversation with me and another guy in which we happened to be talking about bikes. Nothin major just talking comfort factors and such of an f4i vs rr. He starts in about his old BMW. Thats great sure it's a comfy old bike. Then he has to tell us all about his buddy in montana who's got the new BMW sport bike and that it can hit a top speed of 230 mph stock. Ok i know BMW makes a sportyer bike than ya normally see, but I don't think there is any bike that can hit that number stock and if so it sure an hell is not a bemmer.

I get tired of people telling me "man why ya get the 600 those things are little"

And never fails i take my car out for a nice cruise and some little punk in a 6 different color civic pulls up and starts revin it up and wanting to race. Or the random car telling me "hey man lightem up. Come on, what not enough power to spinum" Ya why in the hell do i want to smoke $250 a piece tires into nothing? For a car load of woman Hell ya. Anyone else a HELL NO

RE: The Story!
 

hahaha trans... its always their friend that does the crazy ****, or their cousin on the busa, my boy pat, hes a good kid, but he tells some insane lies. such as

" i was at my cousins riding my dirt bike (i havent seen his dirtbike move in 2.5 years by the way) my cousins friend pulls up in a busa *insert phony country boy accent* and i jumped on it and just walked it to like 80 mph"

lies

RE: The Story!
 

Haha I was at a Pub i had never been to with 2 friends of mine. We parked out bikes out front in a row, (no, we were not drinking, just grabbin a bite to eat)

Anyway, out front was my pretty much stock '02 F4i with and directly next to it was my buddies '03 R1, which has been strpped due to his desire to stunt, either way the R1 is still much, much more of a bike than mine, just not as "pretty"

Anyway this "Cruiser" rider comes in, "Who's got the Honda out front". At first it didn't click, I had assumed they were talking about him, but my buddy looks at me. I'm like "Oh that's me." He start's in with the normal "Man that is one nice friggin bike. What is it?" I answer and we talk a bit, the whole time I wanted to just shift the attention to my friend who's bike is just much more impressive to the trained eye, but I kept the spotlight. He finishes off with "Well my wife would never let me get somethin like that, I'd kill myself, so she made me get a cruiser". I wanted to just be like "Seriosuly, your wife could ride that thing without any worries, you should take that friggin R1 for a spin!" But I just let him walk away looking like a fool.

RE: The Story!
 

I dont even want to go into all the stories I get. But in one day, two different places I got the, "yeah my buddy died on one of them (did a wheelie into the back of a car, and the other couldnt make a hard left on a freeway on ramp, hit the wall.)." And I get people who tell me how their bike is or was so F-ing fast. Then I tell them mine can hit over 160mph and they just shut up or tell me about something stupid thing they did and almost died or what not. I feel like if you want to come up and talk bikes or complment mine thats cool. But I dont want to hear your F-ing BS stories, how your buddy did stoppie into a Mail truck or your life story. I got riding to do damn it!