Now I'm not one to put my business out in the open. But let's face it, we really don't know each other than in a broad sense. And even if we were at the same duty station. The odds on you knowing who I am is slim to none. Now I have been over at the Marine forum for couple of hours and have nothing but total support for my side of this issue, but would like to hear from a different group Here is the issue at hand. With as much detail as I can provide
I had a very heated argument over the phone with my wife tonight and she did not come to Florida with me because I'm only going to be here for a very short period of time and I fully agree. There was no sense in uprooting everyone for such a short trip. And shortly after leaving here, I will be redeploying there in itself lies the issue I was told I was being selfish and inconsiderate and I never put my family first ever. Now the reason she is saying this has nothing to do with me being a Marine somewhat. It has to do with the fact that I actively campaigned and volunteered to go back this time. My reasoning for this as best I can explain without divulging too much is that while recovering from my injuries. I studied as much about Iraq and the Middle East as I could and tactics of Muslim warriors throughout history. I came up with what I believe, to be a sound theory for dealing with insurgency, in close quarter battle. I floated this theory to my CO. not everyone was impressed to say the least but I was given permission to deploy with a unit that was capable of carrying out this tactic. And yes I will be going to some of the most dangerous areas possible and there is a good chance this will be no more effective than anything else that has been tried. But maybe it will be . I think most of you can without me explaining understand part of her side of the story. Being a young mother witha small children it was so bad tonight. I was told. When I return I will have to make a choice, which even after returning will be impossible. At least for a little while I could not get out now if I wanted to. Now I will be in the field for three days or should I say, the swamps conducting some more useless training for where I'm going Damn did I say that out loud and have no way to check this thread For that period of time, but maybe when I return I will be enlightened or reassured in my decisionsg and maybe someone will have given sound advice on my problem

 

All you can do is tell her you love her and what you are doing is for your country and family. On a side note, you should know how much your sacrifice is appreciated by everyone. Good luck and stay as safe as possible.

 

Your wife is correct. At some point you need to realize that they are the most important thing in your life. I understand you think you may have something that counters what is going bad over there, but that just means you will be more apt to get killed.

 

Like you said, we don't know each other. So surely all of your efforts are for you and your family, rather than for 'us' - the ones you don't know. We all appreciate your efforts, but in the end you do what you do for your family - right ? I hope that you can work it all out for your family.

Be safe,

 

you have very hard choices to make.....in the end you need to "balance" family and military. Sometimes 1 suffers, sometimes the other does......who needs you the most? This mission does sound very very dangerous, and if you go i wish you the best of luck, but keep in mind you have a family that you are immediately responsible for.

 

i agree with everything said previously. But you may have to start thinking of things from her prepective from time to time and realize she needs to be there more than you think. Trust me we all appreciate you and the rest of the armed forces for you have and are doing. Thank You.

 

Thanks for your service, but man get a grip. You're volunteering to leave your family to go there? I don't understand. I know some work-aholics that don't spend enough time with their families, but I think military personnel are the worst about it.
No way in hell I'd leave my family to go fight some towel heads. If I was single, yes.
Honestly, I don't think there is a way to defeat them short of killing them all. Their level of hatred goes deeper than we can understand. What exactly is your plan?

 

im in the army and just got back from deployment. basically from my history with wives and deployment etc....its usually the military or your family. i've seen so many of my boys get divorced or have their money gone etc. this is a pretty bleek spin but when it comes down to it....its one or the other.

 

1st of all, thank you so much for your service.

But, you're going to need to weigh your options carefully. I personally am going through a very hard time with my wife who recently told me that she loves me, but isn't "in love" with me anymore along with other things that have just rocked my world as of late last week. I wouldn't wish it on anybody. Your marriage should come first in everything I believe, but then again I'm just a test engineer and although my work involves building of naval equipement, it doesn't have quite as much honor and dignity as that of a serviceman.

I've come to the realization the hard way that NOTHING is worth sacrificing loved ones. Money means ****, my job means **** except that it provides and the company sure as hell doesn't care what the state of my marriage is, motorcycles, cars, or any other toys don't mean **** compared to enjoying the love and affection from someone you love so dearly and being with them.

Inasmuch as I would love to be out there fighting for my country if I were a serviceman with as much dedication, honor and loyalty as you, I would much rather fight for the well being and happiness of my family, friends and loved ones, because they're the ones who care the most (and sometimes the ONLY ones) and appreciate it the most.Granted, you're doing it in a different way in the field, but it's not going to have as much of a profound influence on the well being of your family in addressing their immediate needs.

I'm having to go through hell right now, we're seeing a marriage counselor and I've come to the conclusion that my own neglect has caused our problems. I don't want anybody else do to the same thing.

 

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Thank you HardCorp!
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