The RedNeck Sexual IQ Test




1) A condom is a large apartment complex.
True or False

2) Spread Eagle is an extinct bird.
True or False

3) Vagina is a medical term used to describe a Heart Attack.
True or False

4) A menstrual cycle has three wheels.
True or False

5) A G-string is part of a fiddle.
True or False

6) Anus is a Latin term for yearly.
True or False




7) ********* are found on an Octopus.
True or False

8) Asphalt describes rectal problems.
True or False

9) ********** is used to catch large fish.
True or False

10) Fetus is a character on Gunsmoke.
True or False

11)An umbilical cord is part of a parachute.
True or False

12) A pubic hair is a wild rabbit.
True or False




13) An orgasm is a person who accompanies a church choir.
True or False

14) A diaphragm is a drawing in geometry.
True or False

15)An erection is when Japanese people vote.
True or False

16) A lesbian is a person from the Middle East.
True or False

17) Pornography is the business of making records.
True or False

18) Genitals are people of non-Jewish origin.
True or False

 

Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties & local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink by any woman.

Many females use a date-rape-drug on the market called ' Beer' .

The drug is found in liquid form and is available anywhere. It comes in bottles, cans, or from taps and in large kegs.

Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and sleep with them.

A woman needs only to get a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then simply ask him home for no-strings-attached sex.

Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several Beers, men will often succumb to the desires to sleep with horrific looking women to whom they would never normally be attracted.

After drinking Beer , men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that 'something bad' occurred.

At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's savings, in a familiar scam known as 'a relationship'. In extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer-term form of servitude and punishment referred to as 'marriage'.

Men are much more susceptible to this scam after Beer is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females.

Please forward this warning to every male you know.

If you fall victim to this ' Beer' scam and the women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter with similarly victimized men.

For the support group nearest you, just look up 'Golf Courses'in the phone book.

For a video to see how Beer works click link below:


Beer Demo

 

Ah! Mo we've all been victims at some point in our lives. Love the beer goggle's link as well

 

Subject: Fw: A wise ole Biker??

A crusty old biker out on a long summer ride in the country pulls up to a tavern in the middle of no where, parks his bike and walks inside.

As he passes through the swinging doors, he sees a sign hanging over the bar:

COLD BEER: $2.00

HAMBURGER: $2.25

CHEESEBURGER: $2.50

CHICKEN SANDWICH : $3.50

HAND JOB: $50.00

Checking his wallet to be sure he has the necessary payment, the ole' biker walks up to the bar and beckons to the exceptionally attractive female bartender who is serving drinks to a couple of sun-wrinkled farmers.

She glides down behind the bar to the ole biker.

"Yes?" she inquires with a wide, knowing smile, "may I help you?"

The ole biker leans over the bar, "I was wondering young lady," he whispers, "are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?"

She looks into his eyes with that wide smile and purrs "Why yes, yes, I sure am".

The ole' biker leans closer and into her left ear whispers softly, "Well, wash your hands real good, cause I want a cheeseburger".

 

Free Sex..

Two bikers rode into a gas station in Indiana for a fill-up, because they
heard about a contest being offered by the station to patrons who purchased a full tank of gas. When they went inside to pay, the men asked the attendant about the contest.

 

The Irish Golfer



A golfer playing in Ireland hooked his drive into the woods. Looking for his ball, he found a little Leprechaun flat on his back, a big bump on his head and the golfer's ball beside him.



Horrified, the golfer got his water bottle from the cart and poured it over the little guy, reviving him.



'Arrgh! What happened?' the Leprechaun asked.



'I'm afraid I hit you with my golf ball', the golfer says.



'Oh, I see. Well, ye got me fair and square. Ye get three wishes, so whaddya want?'



'Thank God, you're all right!' the golfer answers in relief. 'I don't want anything, I'm just glad you're OK, and I apologize.'



And the golfer walks off.



'What a nice guy,' the Leprechaun says to himself.



I have to do something for him. I'll give him the three things I would want... a great golf game, all the money he ever needs, and a fantastic sex life.'



A year goes by and the golfer is back. On the same hole, he again hits a bad drive into the woods and the Leprechaun is there waiting for him.



'Twas me that made ye hit the ball here,' the little guy says. 'I just want to ask ye, how's yer golf game?'



'My game is fantastic!' the golfer answers. I'm an internationally famous golfer now.' He adds, 'By the way, it's good to see you're all right.'



'Oh, I'm fine now, thank ye. I did that fer yer golf game, you know. And tell me, how's yer money situation?'



'Why, it's just wonderful!' the golfer states. 'When I need cash, I just reach in my pocket and pull out 100 pound bills I didn't even know were there!'



'I did that fer ye also.' And tell me, how's yer sex life?'



The golfer blushes, turns his head away in embarrassment, and says shyly, 'It's OK.'



C'mon, c'mon now,' urged the Leprechaun, 'I'm wanting to know if I did a good job. How many times a week?'



Blushing even more, the golfer looks around then whispers, 'Once, sometimes twice a week.'



'What??' responds the Leprechaun in shock 'That's all? Only once or twice a week?'



'Well,' says the golfer, 'I figure that's not bad for a Catholic priest in a small parish.'

 

A koala is sitting up a gumtree smoking a joint when a little lizard walks past and looks up and says "Hey Koala! What are you doing?"


The koala says: "Smoking a joint, come up and have some."

So the little lizard climbs up and sits next to the koala and they have a few joints.

After a while the little lizard says his mouth is 'dry' and is going to get a drink from the river.

But the little lizard is so stoned that he leans too far over and falls into the river.

A crocodile sees this and swims over to the little lizard and helps him to the side, then asks the little lizard: "What's the matter with you?"

The little lizard explains to the crocodile that he was sitting smoking a joint with the koala in the tree, got too stoned and then fell into the river while taking a drink.

The crocodile says he has to check this out and walks into the rain forest, finds the tree where the koala is sitting finishing a joint, and he looks up and says "Hey you!"


So the koala looks down at him and says
"Fuuuuuuucck dude.......how much water did you drink?!!"