So, last night I say up late to get an upgrade version of Norton Anti-Virus downloaded. This morning my misses asks why I was up so late. I said, "To get Norton upgraded and updated." She gives me the "sink eye" and says, "Never mind." She says that the computer will not connect to the internet. I asked if she unplugged the modem and waited a minute and replugged it back in. "NO, I didn't." So, I do it and the computer connects to the internet. Fixed. NOT, quiet.
Seems the misses had a bad dream about me. She says, "Aren't you going to say you're sorry?" I say, "What did I do?" She says, "You left me for that other woman." I said, "I was sleeping beside you, how the F&^k could I do that?" Well, I'm F&^ked no matter what I say because it was her dream!!!
So, I get pissed, get the CBR-F out and decide to implement the over 5,500 rpm riding style Classic and Shadow said to try. It works great!!! Lots of snap and real fun. Until, I get to about 135 mph and pass a Nevada Highway Patrol... I looked at the speedo and said, "OMG, this dude is going to throw the key into the F&^king Benjo ditch when he catches me!" So, I crank it up and head over the rise and hope to find a side road to ditch him...
Great F&^king move, I'm flying at about 140 mph and over the rise are 6 or more (I can't count that fast) cows in the Fr*&king road (it is open range land out here in Nevada)!!! So, I just say, "Look where you want to go!" I hit the bicycle lane white line at about 120 mph past them cows!!! I look in my mirror and the Nevada Highway patrol is in the ****** wire fence causing one heck of a dust cloud (I guess you could call it a desert dust devil)!!!! I go up the road about 2 miles and turn off into a residental area and two NHP cars fly by. I get back on the road and head home.... My wife has dinner for me and my dogs missed me. I have yet to say anything to her and she has yet to say anything to me.....
But, I am fed, have Keystone Ice to chase my JD on ice down with. What a Fr&^king day! I think it is time to toss a few wet paint brushes on the neigbhor's roof for relaxation!!! Maybe I should let my registration run out to keep me off the road - NOT....
Shadow and Classic, 5,500 rpm does the trick and looking where you want to go works well if the Fr*&king cows don't move!!! Where is my JD....???
P.S. It was her dream, I have no control over her dreams!!! F&^k me!

 

Geezus Joe...I know its not funny really, but fvuckme , om frigin wetting my daks here !! ***** still ...

What a day !! but hey chit , look at the bright side yu save a sprocket change to alter the gearing mate ...LOL
I can honestly say that you must have gone and finally experienced the real Cane mate.... these old buses DO go like freakin chit out of a shanghai like I have said allot !!
Yu only got to let them have some gas


"still pissing myself here mate" LOL

Cops
Cows
Yu misses
Yu computer .....I hope you sip or guzzle down s few at least mate ...LOL om still chuckling here !!

 

a believer !
and a Fugitive
and divorced
and prolly dunk as a skunk now as well ....

 

Trout brother, you are right! Radios are faster than a cane, but that is why I turned off into the residential area. The cops were high tailing it to the sceen to get me. I knew it, so I went into the first turn out street and waited for them to pass. Once they passed, I took off behind them. I then took the back roads home. One thing bothers me about the chase. The cop that originally was after me was coming towards me. He had to of known those cows were there or a higher authority set them in the street after he passed them! He came from their direction.
Years ago, I was riding on Hwy 29 in Lake County, California with my wife on back. We were on a Honda Valkyrie. I was going about 75 mph when all of a sudden 3 horses jumped onto the Freeway and headed right at us. Those Valkyries are heavy and when I hit the front brakes my wife slid forward into me and made it impossible to try to manuver. I was stuck up against the gas tank with my arms bent and the horses were coming up fast. I just kept on the front brakes hard and just when it looked like I would hit them at about 25 mph, I let go of the front brakes and went left. Horses are fast reacting animals and they went to their left also. Missed them. One of the horses got hit by the car behind us!
That is when my wife decided to get her own motorcycle license and motorcycle. She now has a Suzuki S40 Boulevard (650cc), single thumper. Of course, it just sits in the garage because she is terrified of all the animals on the road - go figure...
Let's see, Woodpecker to the head, Hummingbird to the faceshield, Deer to the left hand, quail to the left leg, near miss with horses, very near miss with cows. I need more speed in my bike so I am past the point of impact! If I am at the impact point a few seconds earlier, the animals would not exist in front of me, therefore, no impact! Sounds logical....
P.S. The reason for the dream and subsequent fight? Pre-menstral and Menopausal!!!! OMG!!!
Hey, Dream Man are you out there? They look great at 20 and fit in a riding suit fine, but they are menstral and menopausal at 50! Where the F&(&k did my glass of JD go? Reflecting back at today, it really was a good day after all or the JD has kicked in real well.....

 

TroutMan, I think you hit on a good way to get the "ok" to buy another bike! The old lady has got to feel guilty, then I will spring it on her that I would like another bike. That just might work. I'll tell her that she is the one thinking about cheating according to a prominent Psychologist's findings. Works for me brother! Thanks!
Some people say that it is skill that makes things happen. I say it is a lot of dumb luck and timing that makes things happen in life. Dumb luck and timing. Yesterday was dumb luck and timing on my part. But, I did enjoy the adrenaline rush at the time. Yesterday convinced me beyond a doubt that each of us has a destiny and fate is there to keep us on the road to our destiny. Why?
I went back out there this morning in my car, yes car (I'm not stupid, dumb yes, but not stupid). The rancher is fixing his wire fence. There is one thing that is distrubing to me....
Yesterday, I saw the white line of the bicycle lane and rode on it past the cows. The white line was my "look where you want to go" point in my vision. It attracted my vision and gave me a point where I could not go any further without going off the road into the sandy roadside like the cop did. There are no white bicycle lines on that Fre&*king road!!! Dumb luck, timing, Gods????? Nope, fate and destiny...
P.S. I keep having these dreams of being is Aussieville riding a saddled up Roo, while I am dressed for a black and white event wearing a top hat with my coat tails. Steve any thoughts???? Maybe I'm going through womanopause? Just kidding....