Save the Kittens
#13
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Newcastle, N.S.W. Australia
Posts: 2,473
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RE: Save the Kittens
DOG DIARY
8:00 am - Dog food! My favourite thing! 9:30 am - A car ride! My favourite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favourite thing! hu hu
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favourite thing! hu hu
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favourite thing! hu hu
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favourite thing! hu hu
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favourite thing! hu hu
5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favourite thing! hu hu
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favourite thing! hu hu
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favourite thing! hu hu
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favourite thing! hu hu
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
CAT DIARY
Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat,
while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the
rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet.
I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of.
However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.
Bastards!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event.
However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies."
I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his
feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly.
I am certain that he reports my every move.
My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe.
For now...
8:00 am - Dog food! My favourite thing! 9:30 am - A car ride! My favourite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favourite thing! hu hu
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favourite thing! hu hu
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favourite thing! hu hu
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favourite thing! hu hu
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favourite thing! hu hu
5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favourite thing! hu hu
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favourite thing! hu hu
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favourite thing! hu hu
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favourite thing! hu hu
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
CAT DIARY
Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat,
while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the
rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet.
I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of.
However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.
Bastards!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event.
However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies."
I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his
feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly.
I am certain that he reports my every move.
My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe.
For now...
#19
#20