Oh man, I didn't think anybody else's parents used one of those! My parents had one too! It had a thin delrin rod in the center and over that it was like a nylon woven cover. That thing stung like a bitch. My brother an I got that on quite a few occasions, and I'm glad they did it too (not at the time though). I used to swipe it and hide it from them so they couldn't find it to use on us lol.

 

my step dad severly beat me and my brother till we ended up in the hospital and in foster homes.I would never beat my son,but I will put a hand to his *** if needed.I don't care how people raise their children.I raise mine as I see fit.He is to the point now that he might get wooped every 6 months or longer now.He is also one of the best behaved kids in his school His teachers have told me.They also know I will woop his butt. his teachers have said to me only if more parents could be like you .Kids these days woukldn't be soo bad

 

In what state is spanking illegal? What I understand most states laws to be is that you may spank, but you will not leave a mark that lasts more than 24 hrs. Example would be that when spanked the child has a red butt = ok. Spankingwith bruising = not ok.

It is a generation thing, I'm 40 and was spanked when it was needed, my teenage daughters were spanked when needed and they are both loved by their teachers and have never been in trouble in school. They were not spanked all the time, but when they did something really bad they did get one. The children that get in trouble all the time seem to be the ones that were either abused or the children from homes where punishment was non existent.

Am I or was I the perfect parent? I doubt it as parenting is very hard. However I believe I have done everythijng I could to help my children understand that actions have consequences, which will help them as they leave my guidance and enter adulthood. To allow a child to grow up with warnings and or little punishment for actions that deserve more will send them into the world with a (The world owes me everything attitude) which will take them years to overcome, along with much hatred and heartache while doing so.

Don't spank or punish your child if it's your wish, but be prepared for the outcome if you do so.

 

I remember only one situation when my mum hit me... and I know that it was my fault. I was 10 years old and I was riding on my bicycle. The weather wasn't good, it was going to rain... unfortunately I got wet heavyly that day...I wanted to dry my clothessoIdidn't go home but I stayed outside. It was big mistakes and when I went to home my mum was angry with me and she hit me by belt. It was funny because I didn't feel any pain and I was laughing at her. After than my mum never hit me...
Now I'm 22 and I don't think about my children, I'm too young for being a father but I think that I won'tnever hit my own child, any child. It's a lot of any ways to bring up your child. You don't have to use your force.

 

I was spanked when I was a kid... not only by a switch, but sometimes I'd have to go out and get the switch off the tree! I know now, that was used to make me think about it and the actual spanking wasn't really that bad. My Mom would spank me with stuff like floppy house shoes! ha ha ha! No way that could hurt, but I would act like it did.

I spanked my kids when they needed it. Unfortunately, my youngest son (the only one still living at home - the others are grown and on their own) - well unfortunately, he got my bad temper and had a devil of a time trying to control it. He got spankings probably more than the rest. I remember one time he was about to get a spanking. He looked me in the eye - he was probably 6 or 7 - and said: Dad, do you HAVE to spank me? I told him: Son, I never HAVE to spank you - you decide if you're going to get a spanking or not by how you behave.

He got his spanking that day, but I swear I cannot ever remember spanking him again. I think he took that to heart that day and made a conscious decision on how to behave and carry himself. Today he is a Junior in High School. He's never been in any trouble, played Varsity baseball as a sophomore and earned the respect of the older boys on the team. But his teachers say he won't let anyone take advantage of him either. He even will stand up to the teachers and challenge what they are saying - in a respectful way. But he only respects the ones that give him real answers... not the ones that say what they are saying is right just because they said so.

My sister didn't spank her kids. They just took advantage of her and she let them. She would patiently tell them the right way over and over and over and over. They are scoundrels to this day.

I love my Mom and Dad and have no greater respect for any other humans on this earth. I know my kids love me and respect me as well. And by the way, my Dad is technically my Step-Father. But to me, he will always be my Dad and I could never love someone more.

Sorry for the long post.

 

Two comments from previous posts really hit the mark. First, spanking is for exceptional situations, where the child is endangering himself or someone else, orwhereblatant disrespect is being shown for other people. Second, it for situationswhere immediate consequences are needed. My own observsation is that it's for children too young to reason with. By the time a kid is six or seven spanking is probably no longer needed. The language thing - one of my son had his mouth washed out with Dial soap. It made an impression. A couple years later when his younger brother needed the same treatment he begged the wife to not do it, it was horrible. That in itself made enough of an impression onthe youngerbrother that language was no longer a problem.

Thebest example of appropriate spanking I've ever seen was a three year old being taken out of a church meeting by his mother. He was hanging onto her neck, telling her he loved her and that she loved him and he didn't want a spanking. She told him that she had told him he couldn't continure the behavior (whatever it was) and that if it did she would have to spank him. He promised he'd never do it again. She said, "I'm sorry, I really don't want to spank you, but you were warned, and I said you'd get a spanking if you didn't stop. You didn't stop, so now I have to spank you." He might have been able to feel the swat she gave him, it was very gentle, but he reacted as if she had broken his bottom. She held him on her lap until he quieted down, hugged him, and told him she hoped he'd never make her have to spank him again because it made her so sad when she had to. He said he wouldn't ever make her spank him again and snuggled up to her. I knew that familly very well for several years and have to say their kids were great. Not perfect, just really great people.

 

Quoute from KRASH..
" if your child is running up and down the room at a nice restruant yelling
screaming, telling you no, having a fit, and your gonna say time out little tommy thats not
nice, you've already lost control a long time ago....... a quick swat to the but will grab his attention,
thats what its for. Its not to inflict pain, a little stinging yes. quick and immediate results that a 4 yr old will
understand....you cant reason very well with a 4yr old."
**You messed up when you lost control. all that you just said is an excuse to say your right. more like one of those, theres nothing i couldv'e done things
If seen 4 year play instruments almost like professionals and a 6 year old play great baseball, if they couldn't be reasoned with they wouldn't have skills like that. thas the dumbest thing i heard
A HUGE PART OF WHY YOU HIT YOUR KID IS CUZ IT RELIEVES STRESS AND MAKES U THINK UR IN CONTROL CUZ YOUR BEING ALL BIG AND TOUGH. LIKE "I'LL SHOW YOU!!", "YEA I THOUGHT SO"
A quick swat??? did you meana good smack!!!!!!!!!!