T'was on the good ship Venus!
#1
T'was on the good ship Venus!
T'was on the good ship Venus
My god you should 'a' seen us!
The figurehead was a man in bed
With a fully erected *****!
The ship's cooks' name was Mabel
My God! Now she was Able!
She'd give the crew, their daily screw
Upon the kitchen table!
Any one remember any other verses from this bawdy song, or indeed any other bawdy song?
My god you should 'a' seen us!
The figurehead was a man in bed
With a fully erected *****!
The ship's cooks' name was Mabel
My God! Now she was Able!
She'd give the crew, their daily screw
Upon the kitchen table!
Any one remember any other verses from this bawdy song, or indeed any other bawdy song?
#2
Not 100% certain that this is an entirely good direction?
But seeing as how we have already started down this track, who can pass up that Inuit classic
"The tale of Eskimo (now Inuit) Nell"
Gather 'round, all you whorey,
Gather 'round, and hear my story.
When a man grows old and his ***** grow cold,
And the tip of his ***** turns blue;
When it bends in the middle like a one-string fiddle,
He can tell you a tale or two.So pull up a chair and stand me a drink,
And a tale to you I'll tell
About Dead-Eye Dick and Mexican Pete
And a harlot named Eskimo Nell.
And so it goes on.
Interesting that we're getting all classy and highbrow in the Saloon, couple of limericks, the odd ditty, next thing you know Steve will break out his haiku.
"The tale of Eskimo (now Inuit) Nell"
Gather 'round, all you whorey,
Gather 'round, and hear my story.
When a man grows old and his ***** grow cold,
And the tip of his ***** turns blue;
When it bends in the middle like a one-string fiddle,
He can tell you a tale or two.So pull up a chair and stand me a drink,
And a tale to you I'll tell
About Dead-Eye Dick and Mexican Pete
And a harlot named Eskimo Nell.
And so it goes on.
Interesting that we're getting all classy and highbrow in the Saloon, couple of limericks, the odd ditty, next thing you know Steve will break out his haiku.
#4
#5
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Public Warning
If you are sober , under 45 OR halve at least half a brain left , well then DO NOT read , take a glance at or watch or listen to the **** below !!! *****
and no , I did not just remember all of that lot Steve !!!! lolol
The Original & True Ver (The Good Ship Venus) - YouTube
If you are sober , under 45 OR halve at least half a brain left , well then DO NOT read , take a glance at or watch or listen to the **** below !!! *****
T'was on the good ship Venus,
By God you should've seen us,
The figurehead was a nude in bed,
Sucking a red hot *****.
Frigging on the rigging,
Wanking on the planking,
Masturbating on the grating,
There's **** all else to do.
The Captain's name was Slugger,
He was a dirty bugger,
He wasn't fit to shovel ****,
On any bugger's lugger.
The Second Mate's name was Andy,
His legs were long and bandy.
They filled his *** with molten brass,
For pissing in the brandy.
The Third Mate's name was Carter,
By God, he was a farter,
When the wind wouldn't blow
And the ship wouldn't go,
We'd get Carter the farter to start her.
The Welsh guy's's name was Morgan,
He was a grisly Gorgon.
Three times a day he strummed away,
Upon his sexual organ.
The Irishman was Wiggum,
By God he had a big 'un.
We bashed that ****,
With a bloody rocks,
For cumming in the riggin'.
The Englishman was Slater,
He was a masturbator.
He'd pump and pump his massive stump,
And clean the mess up later.
The Captain's wife was Mabel,
Whenever she was able.
She gave the crew their daily screw,
Upon the messroom table.
His mistress was called Charlotte,
Who was born and bred a harlot
Her legs at night were lily-white,
But in the morning they were scarlet.
The Captain's randy daughter,
Was swimming in the water,
Delighted squeals came as eels,
Entered her sexual quarter.
Then there was the Navigator,
He was a fornicator.
All round the world when he met a girl
The bastard tried to mate 'er.
The cook whose name was Freeman,
He was a dirty demon,
He served the crew with menstrual stew,
And hymens fried in semen.
The other cook O'Mally,
He didn't dilly dally,
He shot his bolt with such a jolt,
He whitewashed half the galley.
The lookout's name was Herbert,
A gastronomical pervert.
He puts it in, through thick and thin,
And whacks off in the sherbet.
The Bosun's name was Lester,
He was a hymen tester.
Through hymens thick, he shoved his *****,
And leave it there to fester.
The engineer McTavish,
Young girls he did ravish.
His missing tool's at Istanbul,
He was a trifle lavish.
A homo was the Purser,
He couldn't have been worser,
With all the crew he had a screw,
Until they yelled, "Oh, no sir."
Another one was Cropper,
Oh Christ he had a whopper.
Twice round the deck,
once round his neck,
And up his bum for a stopper.
The cabin boy was Kipper,
A dirty little nipper,
He lined his *** with broken glass,
And circumcised the skipper.
The ship's dog's name was Rover,
The whole crew did him over,
They'd ground and ground that faithful hound,
From Singapore to Dover.
So now we end this serial,
Through sheer lack of material,
We wish you luck and freedom from
Dis-eases ven-ereal.
By God you should've seen us,
The figurehead was a nude in bed,
Sucking a red hot *****.
Frigging on the rigging,
Wanking on the planking,
Masturbating on the grating,
There's **** all else to do.
The Captain's name was Slugger,
He was a dirty bugger,
He wasn't fit to shovel ****,
On any bugger's lugger.
The Second Mate's name was Andy,
His legs were long and bandy.
They filled his *** with molten brass,
For pissing in the brandy.
The Third Mate's name was Carter,
By God, he was a farter,
When the wind wouldn't blow
And the ship wouldn't go,
We'd get Carter the farter to start her.
The Welsh guy's's name was Morgan,
He was a grisly Gorgon.
Three times a day he strummed away,
Upon his sexual organ.
The Irishman was Wiggum,
By God he had a big 'un.
We bashed that ****,
With a bloody rocks,
For cumming in the riggin'.
The Englishman was Slater,
He was a masturbator.
He'd pump and pump his massive stump,
And clean the mess up later.
The Captain's wife was Mabel,
Whenever she was able.
She gave the crew their daily screw,
Upon the messroom table.
His mistress was called Charlotte,
Who was born and bred a harlot
Her legs at night were lily-white,
But in the morning they were scarlet.
The Captain's randy daughter,
Was swimming in the water,
Delighted squeals came as eels,
Entered her sexual quarter.
Then there was the Navigator,
He was a fornicator.
All round the world when he met a girl
The bastard tried to mate 'er.
The cook whose name was Freeman,
He was a dirty demon,
He served the crew with menstrual stew,
And hymens fried in semen.
The other cook O'Mally,
He didn't dilly dally,
He shot his bolt with such a jolt,
He whitewashed half the galley.
The lookout's name was Herbert,
A gastronomical pervert.
He puts it in, through thick and thin,
And whacks off in the sherbet.
The Bosun's name was Lester,
He was a hymen tester.
Through hymens thick, he shoved his *****,
And leave it there to fester.
The engineer McTavish,
Young girls he did ravish.
His missing tool's at Istanbul,
He was a trifle lavish.
A homo was the Purser,
He couldn't have been worser,
With all the crew he had a screw,
Until they yelled, "Oh, no sir."
Another one was Cropper,
Oh Christ he had a whopper.
Twice round the deck,
once round his neck,
And up his bum for a stopper.
The cabin boy was Kipper,
A dirty little nipper,
He lined his *** with broken glass,
And circumcised the skipper.
The ship's dog's name was Rover,
The whole crew did him over,
They'd ground and ground that faithful hound,
From Singapore to Dover.
So now we end this serial,
Through sheer lack of material,
We wish you luck and freedom from
Dis-eases ven-ereal.
The Original & True Ver (The Good Ship Venus) - YouTube
Last edited by gotcbr; 09-19-2012 at 04:04 PM.
#9